Yesterday I happened to flip through a book called something about dealing with insomnia or something like that and absentminded or stubborn or narrowminded or a smartass as I was (mostly am) I thought: "Nääh, insomnia, must be something that doctors diagnose..nothing that I could possibly ever had..me?! never..no, can't be. Things like this happen only to others. It can't be like the wave of those "self-diagnosed" hyper active children. Remember? "Oh, yeah, my child is hyper active. That's why he's like a little fucking devil and is driving me maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaadddd. But yeah, what can I do, He's my little hyper active angel." Get real! Being hyper active is not like having a sore throat. And an active or inquisitive OR bratty child does definitely not mean being hyper active. At least as far as I know..prove me wrong..
So , there I was, convinced that being reluctant to sleep does not mean that I might have insomnia, ditched the book and dived into others.
Managed to fall asleep about five or six in the morning..convinced - INSOMNIA-no matter what they say, must be it!
For goodness sake, that's how my night looked like:
Did some practice tests for my English exam, finished about midnight. A sip of coffee (don't say anything!), a bit of reading, then a bit of vocabulary and idioms for the exam..finally killed the lights..nothing happened. Annoying pain in my back and I was getting more and more aware of it. Then thousand thoughts about..everything! Ok, then I really tried to tell myself: "OK, relax now, let it all go, drift away. No worries in the bed, there's nothing I can't postpone til the morning..ok, what's bothering you, get it clear and make it go away.." Nothing happened
Then little strips of poems started to form in my head, me, at the same time, constantly thinking: " Must get a pen, must get a paper, must write it down..must get a pen. must get a pen. must get a pen.."
Then came stories. "Definitely must get a pen now, must get..a pen..must.." Then I heard that the heating went on. " Yess!" ups, hope I didn't wake my roommate up..
And that's how it went on and on..
Pain in my back turned into a loud Eurovision type of music, which is just so annoying and awful crap that you can't even not notice it or switch the bloody channel..
Then, the best part, I became aware of all the sounds and little noises around me and I started to panic, hot flushes running through my body. "For fuck sake, your 24, grow up. You can't be scared of darkness anymore. That's not normal!!!!" It didn't help. Then I saw something moving in the room, saw it in the corner of my eye, a glimpse of a shadow. Oh, man, that was cruel! At least I thought that I saw something..
Changed places in my bed, so I couldn't see the window anymore (You have to admit that windows are scary in the dark) and under the blanket I disappeared..
Alarm
Alarm
Mine
Hers
Alarm
"I want to sleep!!!!"
Further investigation on insomnia is required
So , there I was, convinced that being reluctant to sleep does not mean that I might have insomnia, ditched the book and dived into others.
Managed to fall asleep about five or six in the morning..convinced - INSOMNIA-no matter what they say, must be it!
For goodness sake, that's how my night looked like:
Did some practice tests for my English exam, finished about midnight. A sip of coffee (don't say anything!), a bit of reading, then a bit of vocabulary and idioms for the exam..finally killed the lights..nothing happened. Annoying pain in my back and I was getting more and more aware of it. Then thousand thoughts about..everything! Ok, then I really tried to tell myself: "OK, relax now, let it all go, drift away. No worries in the bed, there's nothing I can't postpone til the morning..ok, what's bothering you, get it clear and make it go away.." Nothing happened
Then little strips of poems started to form in my head, me, at the same time, constantly thinking: " Must get a pen, must get a paper, must write it down..must get a pen. must get a pen. must get a pen.."
Then came stories. "Definitely must get a pen now, must get..a pen..must.." Then I heard that the heating went on. " Yess!" ups, hope I didn't wake my roommate up..
And that's how it went on and on..
Pain in my back turned into a loud Eurovision type of music, which is just so annoying and awful crap that you can't even not notice it or switch the bloody channel..
Then, the best part, I became aware of all the sounds and little noises around me and I started to panic, hot flushes running through my body. "For fuck sake, your 24, grow up. You can't be scared of darkness anymore. That's not normal!!!!" It didn't help. Then I saw something moving in the room, saw it in the corner of my eye, a glimpse of a shadow. Oh, man, that was cruel! At least I thought that I saw something..
Changed places in my bed, so I couldn't see the window anymore (You have to admit that windows are scary in the dark) and under the blanket I disappeared..
Alarm
Alarm
Mine
Hers
Alarm
"I want to sleep!!!!"
Further investigation on insomnia is required
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